Motherhood Intended

Navigating Toddler Sleep Challenges with Expert Aly Dabbs

Jacqueline Baird / Aly Dabbs Season 4 Episode 72

Mastering Toddler Sleep: Strategies for Exhausted Moms

In this episode, Jacqueline welcomes Aly Dabbs, a certified sleep consultant and founder of Restful Baby, who shares her expertise on toddler sleep. Aly discusses her journey into sleep consulting, her methods for establishing successful sleep routines, and offers practical advice for parents struggling with bedtime battles. The conversation delves into Aly's two-step prep and sleep training process, emphasizing a lead-with-love approach and personalized sleep plans. Tune in to learn how to transform bedtime into a peaceful and enjoyable experience for both parent and child.

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Hey friend, welcome to a new episode of Motherhood Intended. Sorry if I sound a little extra raspy this week. Um, of course, you know, my kids have been in school for, oh, I don't know, two, three weeks, and that's how long it took for colds to hit our house.  Mostly myself and Hunter.

It's not COVID, tested negative for COVID, luckily no fevers, but Like itchy, scratchy throat, coughing. Yeah, not feeling a hundred percent. So I apologize for the  extra rasp in my voice this week.

Hopefully you yourself are having a great week. If you're not and you're feeling a little under the weather as fall starts to creep in,  highly suggest going to Starbucks and ordering a medicine ball. I'm pretty sure most people know about this. I don't even know what's all in it.

I can't remember. I think it's like mint tea. Lemonade, honey, I don't know. All I know is it feels so good on the throat. Of course, you can look it up and make it at home too. But you know if you're lazy like me drop the kids off or on your way to work Or just run on out and grab a medicine ball from Starbucks before you hop on your work zoom call or whatever you have going on today. Because I promise you, it'll make you feel that much better. 

Okay, so today's guest on the show is Aly Dabbs. She is a wife and a mom to two wildly curious boys and lives in the Nashville area. Aly is a certified sleep consultant and started her business Restful Baby back in February of this year.

Through working with families, watching her own toddler grow, and taking continued education classes, Aly has developed a love for all things toddler sleep and has become a toddler sleep Sleep expert. It is Aly's passion to help exhausted toddler moms work through those big toddler emotions to get their child to sleep through the night and in their own bed.

Aly's approach is to lead with love and take this dreaded thing bedtime and turn it into something fun. She has also launched her own podcast called Aly, the restful mama, which you can find on Apple, Spotify, or wherever you get your podcasts. 

My conversation with Aly is so fun and educational. So, if you are a mom of a toddler, Listen up. Pay attention to this episode because Aly is going to help you get the sleep that you deserve. I'm not in a season right now where this is the case. I, you know, I have a six and a half year old and almost five year old.

They sleep just fine. I'm mostly dealing with the occasional bad dream, which is pretty easy to remedy at this point. And knock on wood, my five month old, Sleeps through the night beautifully. She's been doing this since about, oh I don't know, 10 weeks? 8 10 weeks? And, oh my gosh, what an angel.

However, I have definitely experienced the crazy season of toddler sleep. And trying to get your child to just go to bed without asking a million questions, without coming out of their room, and sleeping in their own bed. And if you don't have kids yet, take notes, because that way you will be that much more prepared when you are in this position with your own toddler.

And of course, before I share this conversation, I just want to remind you to click the links in the show notes. It'll take you directly to Aly so you can connect with her. Join the Motherhood Intended Community Group. Follow along on Instagram at motherhood underscore intended. And if you yourself would like to share your experiences of motherhood, infertility, family building, please click the link in my show notes and apply to be a guest on this show.

I am always trying to cover all different kinds of topics that I think women will find beneficial, and I would love to hear from you. Okay, without further ado, here's my conversation with Aly. Take a listen.  

Hi, Aly. Thanks for joining me on the podcast today. 

Of course. Thanks for having me. 

I'm so excited to dive into, all things sleep when it comes to our children, but also when it comes to us, because if our babies are rested and so are we. So tell me a little bit about yourself. You're a mom and you are a sleep consultant. I would love to know your background and just how you got started on this path and your experience, with sleep and your children.

 So I have two crazy wild curious boys They are both September babies, and I love being a boy mom. They are going to be one in three next month So their birthdays are like three days apart. So we're doing like this joint birthday party. I'm all excited. Yeah, we're excited I really wanted to have a separate birthday for Nolan our youngest since it's his first We're like, ah people are gonna choose which one to come to if they're back. Weekends and My husband's family is from Illinois, and so they're traveling, and so we're doing like two whole parties in one, so like two themes, and it's gonna be kind of funny.

Yeah, that'll be so fun.

But we live in kind of the Nashville area, so we're here in Tennessee dealing with super hot summers and things right now, ready for the cooler weather, but just loving boy mom life. They are crazy. Our second is absolutely wild and does not stop moving. And so we're just chasing after him all the time.

That is relatable. My oldest two are boys and same thing. Both of them are very active, but my second one has a special type of energy.

 I have heard that the second kids are something special and I'm seeing it. Cause like our first one, he's like our little rule follower and sweet and cuddly and then Nolan, he just like barrels into everything and he's like, I'm here, let's do it.

Yes.  Yeah, that's exactly how ours are. My son Hunter, he's the older one and he is super type A, still has a lot of energy, but like, doesn't want to, yeah, break the rules. Whereas like the things I experienced with my, my younger son, Noah, who, when he turned  three, I was like. Who are you and how are you saying these things to me? Like he's just so  matter of fact and I keep telling myself I'm like, all right, this will be like such a good quality as an adult. Like he's confident. Knows what he wants, but as a toddler and preschooler, I could, I could use less.

Well, for sleep, so when I was pregnant with Joey, I listened to a podcast, all the time. I would go for walks all the time, and so I would listen to this podcast, and she would have these different guest speakers on and everything. And so, by the time he was born, I thought, like, I knew everything, and, you know, I've gotten all this education, I knew exactly what to do, and then, of course, that just, like, went out the window as soon as he was born, because mom life.

But  he was a pretty good sleeper from the start and kind of what I always say is like he was up every two hours eating, but he would go back to sleep pretty easy, but we were still up all night. But he refused to, I, when I went back to work after maternity leave, I was working from home. I had him with me, so he wasn't in daycare or anything.

And he was not. It just like very quickly was not working because I would spend what seemed like hours of my day trying to get him to sleep and I'm upstairs like pacing around. I'm rubbing like that little spot between his eyebrows.  I'm trying everything to get him to sleep and then, you know, just like walking on eggshells trying to lower him into the bed so calmly and quietly so it doesn't wake him up.

All for him to wake up within like minutes. I would sit outside of his bassinet with, like, my arm over the edge, trying to, like, continuously, rub the spot between his eyebrows some more, and then just, like, I would just be crying along with him. Yeah. And it was, like, every single day, and they nap a lot in the beginning, so this was, like, two or three times a day, just spending so much time, and I remember texting my friends, like, This is the definition of crazy like every nap I'm expecting this to go differently and it's not and my poor husband I know like I was super snappy with him.

I was missing meetings at work Like I was absolutely exhausted and I kind of back of my mind dug out this podcast episode that I'd listened to for a sleep consultant I was like, okay, I need to revisit this. Something has to change. So I listened to it and I ended up reaching out to her. And she was so helpful.

She was very patient, very understanding. She walked me through kind of what was happening with my little guy and what we needed to do and helped teach him how and when to sleep, but in a way that I felt okay with. And really, I needed to get out of his way a little bit and give him that space. And so through working with her, he was sleeping.

Which meant my days were way less stressful trying to get him to nap. He started going those longer stretches at night. So everything kind of started improving and clicked into place and you know, if you had bottled all of that up I would have been like, ah, magic. 

Right. 

Everyone needs this. 

Yeah. 

And so that was great, was a game changer. Kind of fast forward, uh, I guess a couple of years. When I was pregnant with our second Nolan and towards the middle to end of the pregnancy I just really I was working like a normal Eight to five job. And I just like, man, they're only little for so long. And, you know, as he was rapidly like, cause due date was approaching, I just felt this like really strong pull that I needed to do something more, that I was no longer happy with where I was working, that I wanted more time with my kids.

That I wanted to be able to do something that they were proud of. My husband was proud of that I could be proud of, but in a meaningful way. And. I kept wrecking my brain and what kept coming back was how this sleep consultant has helped me and what a difference it made and how I just like  I mean, it changed everything, like everything improved.

And so it kept coming back and I started looking into becoming a sleep consultant and what that looks like. How do you become certified and all of these things? When I met the founder of Centers for Pediatric Sleep Management and I immediately jumped on a call with her. I was like, tell me all the things, how does this work?

And I loved her. I loved her program. I loved everything that it offered. And I just dove in. And I. I did the whole program throughout the summer when I was pregnant and ended up graduating and it was just like, I mean, I was loving soaking up all of the things around sleep. And so I graduated from her program about a year ago now, I think like within a week or a few days, even of Nolan being born, which is kind of funny.

You knew what you wanted to do. I love that.

Yes. And so I had him. And I remember actually being in the hospital, like being in all these like Facebook mom groups, answering questions, like, I'm a sleep consultant, I can help and just like connecting with moms. And the biggest part that I just absolutely loved and still do love is being able to help. Mom's through a time that feels really, really hard because it is hard. Like, you know, we listen to these podcasts, we read these books, we have advice from our family and our friends and everything, but it's hard and we're just all trying to survive and figure it out. And so if you can make one piece of that a little bit easier for a mama, that's what I'm all about. And one of the things that I absolutely love about being able to help when it comes to sleep. 

Oh my gosh, a hundred percent. There's so many good things that you just said in there that I'm like, yes, obviously yes. It seems like a little thing, right, to help somebody out with, but sleep's a pretty big one. Like you said, you know,  you were struggling then with like meetings at work and then you're in a snippy mood with your husband, sleep effects, like everything we do and just like being able to function properly and our babies too, right? Like if they are. not napping when they can definitely use a nap.

I mean, that just changes like the trajectory of your day, especially as a first time mom. For those listening that like aren't parents yet. Like just take this all in, soak it all in because you're going to want to come back to this. I promise you every baby is different and every experience is different. But, especially as a first time mom, you know, you, you know, that you're supposed to feed your child, get them to sleep. That's really all they do at first is like sleeping and eating. And when one of those things isn't going well, it just like, affects your overall well being, not to mention that you're postpartum and trying to figure out your new life and going back to work and things like that.

So it is so, so important. So good for you for reaching out and going back to that podcast and figuring it all out. And I love that even though you were in the middle of your second pregnancy, you were like, No, we're gonna do this and I'm gonna help other people. That's so so cool. Actually the nap thing I can definitely relate to with my second.

So my oldest was Born premature and he was in the NICU for like four months and that was a whole thing in itself But when he came home a very silver lining was like he was so regimented and on a schedule of like eating and sleeping Just based off of like being in the hospital and cared for that way  that like we were totally blindsided when we had our second son, like less than two years later and he came home, you know, after a few days in the hospital, like most babies.

And I was like, I don't, I don't know what I'm supposed to do with this. Why isn't he sleeping? What's going on? And I remember I read, I forget which book it was, but basically it was like how to get your baby to sleep 12 hours by 12 weeks and nothing was working. And, we finally got the night sleep down,  probably like four months, but then.

The nap thing was also hard for me, especially as he was a toddler, those toddler years. And  having an older brother too, he was like,  I don't want to miss out. Like if he drops his nap, I don't want to be napping. And it can get tricky, especially at the age where, you know, that they still could use a nap.

Like it was, it was apparent that he needed an afternoon nap when he was like, you know, two and a half, three, but you just like wouldn't do it. But then if we happened to be in the car between the hours of like one and four, he would, fall asleep and then I'd be like trapped in the car because if he woke up he'd be a nightmare.

So There's so much that goes into it and whether it's a newborn baby or a toddler and I know you love focusing more On like the toddler age at this point Is it just more fun because you can actually interact with these children or what do you like most about helping families who have toddlers with their sleep 

Great question. I do love talking all things toddler sleep and kind of going back what you were saying to like, babies are just like, they do so well on the predictability and routine. So, establishing that early on is. Soul key and it makes a diffence later on. Um, and another thing to like with the naps, they are just so much trickier and they're more complex because you don't have that whole sleep pressure built up that you have at the end of the day.

And it's like your body naturally winds down. You have your like melatonin dump and everything towards the end of the night. And you're like, okay, I can go to sleep. But for the daytime. You don't really have that sleep pressure because you've only been up for like four or five hours, depending on what age and how they are on their nap schedules and stuff.

And so they can definitely be a lot harder. And when I work with families, like I'm always like we can break this up. Like we can totally focus on night sleep first and then tackle the tougher stuff and work through naps. That's totally fine. There's no need to do everything all at once. But, for toddlers, Man, I guess like seeing my own little guy like now that he's older and after we hit like 18 months Like not that it wasn't fun before but it just got more fun.

Like something happened at 18 months and we were like Okay, this is cool. And then, like, the closer he got to two, it just got, like, better and better and better. We loved the two year old. Like, in two and a half, the things that he was saying and coming up with, and it was just hilarious. Like, he was his own little person, and And now,  I always say that we, like, got pretty lucky and didn't really hit, like, the terrible twos or anything. But we are on this, like, super slippery slope going into three next month. And I'm like, where did my sweet little baby go some days? And, like, what is happening? A little three nager running around. 

Yes, a three nager. When everyone, was like, oh, the terrible twos, I was like, I don't think this is a thing. I didn't have that with either of my boys and I was like, two is adorable. Like they're so cute and inquisitive and so fun. But yes, as I swear, it was like, On their third birthday, they were like, hi,  I'm a little free danger now and I've got a lot of feelings. 

 For sleep, I guess like just watching him and you can really have fun with the toddlers. Like, like you were saying too, like, you know, they are their own little person. You can involve them so much more. The babies are great. And it's so hard because you're up multiple times a night, you're breastfeeding or bottle feeding or whatever that journey looks like for you. You're up and you're exhausted.

And, you know, if you're a new mom, like. It's all new territory, and you're just trying to survive, and that's hard, but these toddler moms, like, these kids can kick, they can scream, they can run around, they can run into the other room when you're trying to put their pajamas on, and you're just, like, chasing them around the house, having these, like, two hour plus bedtimes, like, they're talking back, they're throwing things, like, and these mommas have been struggling longer, because maybe they've been dealing with this their whole life, and bedtime's always been a struggle, and, you know, if you can turn them This dreaded bedtime, like I've, I've worked with moms and even my friends that have kids and stuff, like they have talked so much about how they just like, it's going to be bedtime and it's going to be chaotic and we just got to get through it.

And I love being able to turn this dreaded thing. That's bedtime into just the sweetest, like most favorite part of both of their days, because I, for one absolutely love looking forward to bedtime. And it's not just because my kids are going to go to sleep and I get some me time.  But we just have so much fun with it.

We get snuggles, we read books, we make it enjoyable and fun and kind of like put games into it and just the bedtime cuddles and just, okay, night, mommy, that you get to hear when you give them a kiss and tuck them in and walk out of the room knowing like, hey, they're there to stay. And you're not going to be in there for two hours.

You're not going to be laying in the floor. Like you're then going to go have that time for you. And that might be an hour of you time where you can take a bath or read a book or do the dishes or laundry that you've been putting off for, Hey, spend some time with your husband who you've probably not actually been able to connect with.

It's like outside of the kids for gosh, who knows how long. I just, I love it. And you can, the involvement with them, the way that they understand, you can communicate with them. You can have games, you can make reward systems, like you can do all of these fun things that you just kind of don't get to do with the babies because they don't understand and they can't communicate back with you and you can reassure your toddler of what's going to happen and what's expected around bedtime. So, there's not this.  Like, okay, this is just happening to them.  They can understand it and be a part of it. 

That makes so much sense. And as you were describing that, like, honestly, what an amazing feeling to end the day that way. Bedtime is really special in our family too. And like you said, not just because I'm exhausted as a parent and I'm like, Oh, thank God the day is over. But  it's  the time to connect with your kids. And I love it because I know no matter how the day goes, whether they're having a hard day, I'm having a hard day. We can always end it on a positive note at that bedtime. I think it makes the daytime easier as a parent and probably for the kids too, knowing that  at the end of the day, you will connect and it will be like a calm. Enjoyable experience. I can't imagine,  for the moms out there who are struggling with this, it's got to be hard going through every day knowing that  one of the hardest parts is  how you're going to end your day. 

so that's so awesome that you help with that. Now, I assume just based off my own experience with my kids, you know, every child is different. Every situation is different. How do you go about getting started helping someone like are there certain things that you look at in their routine or their personality if someone comes to you and they're like, I don't even know our bedtime is taking like hours and it's just a nightmare.  Where do we even begin? How do you help them? 

I I think that is how a lot of people come to me and it, and it kind of surprises me because I feel like. Sleep training, it's kind of like a more common thing, but a lot of people just don't know what it is, or that it's out there, or that there can be help associated with it, and even though it's 2024, like, I feel like it's so hard for moms to ask for help, even though it's totally fine, like, there are resources out there, take advantage of it, but knowing that I just, like, I love all things toddler sleep.

I ended up kind of going back and taking some continuing education classes around toddlers and how they function, navigating through toddler toot and meltdowns and everything like that. So I would be better equipped to handle those things when working with these families. But yeah, these moms, they come to me and they're just like, I don't even know what to do, like help. 

And so I start with just conversation. My favorite part is just being able to, in the beginning, connect with these moms. Like when I jump on a consult call with them, I want to know what they're going through sleep wise, but I want to get to know them.  It's all virtual services, so they can be anywhere.

So like, where are you? And I want to get them to know me because we're going to be working very closely. And so it's a strong relationship. I talk to these people all day for almost a month. And so just really building that connection, seeing what they're going through. I know that, most parents, you know, you can go on Google and be like, Oh, a sleep plan for a seven month old or a two year old or something.

And it's going to spit something out, but it's not accounting for your specific needs or you're a working mom. So you need to be out of the house by six 30. So this plan that says, let your baby sleep till eight o'clock just kind of goes out the window. And so getting to connect with them and, you know, And since a lot of moms still don't know what sleep training is, and I know a lot of people and maybe out there listening today hear the whole sleep training, and it's like,  I'm not comfortable with cry it out.

And I will be the first to say that I'm not either. I'm not hating on it. It works. But if my mommy heart is not okay with the cried out method, I can absolutely not expect someone else to be. And if they're not excited about it and they already don't want to do it. Then they're not going to go into it feeling good about it, they're not going to be excited, they're not going to be confident, and so when it feels really, really hard, they're going to be like, whatever, I'm throwing in the towel, this isn't working.

So I want to go to them, and when we work together, I have a lead with love approach. I want that mom to have all the love and support for their toddler when they're working through whatever their own unique sleep challenges are. In the beginning, and then gradually, slowly pulling back that support as the toddler gains confidence around it.

And I think that that really helps to avoid this big light switch moment. If sleep has looked a certain way for this toddler's whole life. Or even in an extended period of time. And now all of a sudden, day one, mom is expecting me to do something completely different. They're going to get a lot of pushback and it's going to be really hard.

Rightfully so. I know, like if I go somewhere like to work and someone parks in my parking spot, I'm like, Hey, this whole thing just disrupted my whole day. And they're the same way. Change is hard. So, I want to ease them into it, set them up for success. I, um, and kind of, I guess, my own program is a little bit unique when working with toddlers is I do a two step program.

So, I do a prep plan first, really getting their toddlers ready for what's going to happen, lots of communication around sleep, positive sleep associations, kind of looking at some of the things that we can start implementing right away, getting them ready for what's about to come. And then start the sleep training process.

And again, not to cry it out or anything like that. Like I want my mom is out there working with their toddlers one on one throughout the process. And it's kind of like riding a bike. You wouldn't give your toddler one of those little balance bikes for the first time. You'd be like, okay, go ride down the sidewalk.

That would be really overwhelming. And so the same thing with sleep is that we want to have that support. As they practice and develop the skills and then as they, you know, kind of gain that confidence around it, we start pulling back a little bit of support. That way they can do it on their own and feel good about it.

And then kids love praise and rewards and all of that. And so make a big deal about it, have fun with it. And again, taking this like dreaded thing, that's bedtime and making it a fun and positive experience for them. And then another huge piece is the support, right?  I help moms a lot break away from co sleeping.

And a lot of times, like, I'm the cheerleader for the mom, too, because it's hard for moms to let go. You know, they also are used to their little kid falling asleep in their arms, and that's hard to let go of and know that it's okay. And you're not doing anything wrong if you're ready to make that change and get them into their own room.

That sounds like it's such an incredible process and just a good feeling for both the mom and the child. I love that so much. When you were talking about how yeah, of course you can go and Google and you'll get these sleep training PDFs and little schedules, you know, I've done it myself, but Every situation is so different and it really caught me off guard this time around with my four month old because I was like, I've done this before, like, I know what I'm doing, but.

My life now is so different than my life six years ago And I have two kids to get to school and I have like our schedule is different And so I'm reading these schedules and I'm like, what do you mean  I actually need to go wake her up and like adjust this because I can't leave her here So it is it's really interesting how things can change and that's so nice that it's a personalized approach and honestly just having like an actual human being like you and In your corner, I feel like is invaluable because it's like, man, as moms, we are focused on the kids a lot when it comes to the sleep training, but at the root of it all, I mean, it's, it's our sanity too.

I mean, yes, we want them to get good sleep and create good habits, but we can't be our best selves if we are investing so much energy into something like that.  I would assume do that. As a first time mom, you don't always know  even if you've heard of sleep training and maybe things are going well, like, Oh, baby falls asleep on me.

And that's just what we do, or we co sleep. That's just, it works for us. That's what we do.  All of a sudden now, you know, you're going to have a second baby and your toddler, you're like, Oh wait, that was fine. With one child, but now that's not going to work for us introducing another kid into the family, so I can only imagine that there are a lot of parents that might come to you too, at that point realizing like, Oh, this isn't going to work anymore or we didn't realize it wasn't the best situation. So it's really interesting.

 It is. I'm actually working with a mom right now who is expecting her second baby, and she has a three year old currently and She was waking up at like 4 or 5 a. m. And mom's an early riser, too So it wasn't like she was like, you know, I would like that time for myself 

Yeah, 

I'd like to get up and have my coffee and start my day I'm up anyway, so it wasn't a big deal, but then kind of realizing like new baby's on their way pretty soon  You know, maybe she doesn't need 4 or 5 a. m. Which absolutely no talk They should be starting their day that early. I don't even want to start my day that early You Um, and so she came and we started talking and we started, um, you know, implementing an okay to wait clock and then the little girls, she's had a lot of other changes, like  little sis is coming,  had a new classroom at school and, you know, all of these things.

And so some other sleep. Stuff just sort of popping up and kind of some setbacks. And so we've been working through all of that and  It's so funny Every kid is different that I work with and stuff And so one of the pieces that I have my family's do is fill out this intake form to see what your child responds to  And so sometimes we do like sticker charts or things like that to kind of have them motivating and what they're working towards To be able to hey you sleep through the night this many nights or you know, whatever the situation is This child and I are working with then they get a prize of their choosing or whatever mom wants and  She was like, I don't want that sticker chart and she was like throw it away get rid of it I don't want it. And so we had to kind of Pivot a little bit and find what works for her to get her to respond Bond. And so that was kind of funny 'cause you know, every kid is different. 

Oh yeah. 

Sometimes like what works for one does not work for the other. And this kid was like, I could care less about this. Get it away from me, whatever. I am gonna wake up when I want to. And 

that's really funny. With our oldest first, you know,  my type A guy, I mean, he was like, when he was little, stickers were like awesome body training charts. Mm-Hmm. . He loved that satisfaction of like completing something.

Tried that with my younger son and he was like.  No, I'm not, I'm good with that. Like, but then Candy, he was all about that life. So  it's funny how different they all are. So on average, when someone is working with you, obviously, like we've said multiple times, every situation is different, but, what does that look like? Is it like a month long process? Is it dependent on, I guess, progress or how does that work? 

With my toddlers, it's a three week process,  and I usually start with that prep plan first, and so that could look like three to five days. It kind of depends on what the child is currently experiencing for sleep.

If they're a hundred percent co sleeping and have their whole life, then they might need a little bit more time to prepare. So kind of like, the bigger the adjustment, the more time to prepare. And then after that, you get three weeks of support from me. And I always say, like, I'm not disappearing you know, once the three weeks is up, it's not like you can ever contact me again.

I ultimately, I really do want you guys sleeping. So if you have a question, I don't care. Call me, text me, like I'm still there.  But for the toddlers, it's about a three to four week process of working together. We start with that consult call, you fill out the intake, I put together the plan, we go over it, and then you have the support and the plan.

It's just kind of a starting point because again, every kid's different and other things might pop up as we're working together and then we can pivot. We can kind of see what's going on? And,   cheer you on to keep going. My babies, it's a two week process. They're a little bit  easier to adapt and usually you see results a little bit quicker.

So it's about a two week process and I actually, earlier this summer, I worked with the sweetest family. She also has two little boys that are around the same age as mine and her son, the oldest, he just turned four. So he's, like a little over three and a half when we started working together, But he was completely used to falling asleep with mom on the couch and then would be transferred to mom's bed so completely co sleeping and had his whole life and The mom was really really really nervous about sleep training But she had the one year old and she was like look i'm exhausted Neither of these kids will sleep without me even for naps and I can't just sit on the couch You This whole time and I have to go to bed when they have to go to bed and you know, all of these things.

And so we started working together and, we went very slow because I think that there was some hesitation on both mom and the child's part. And so we went really slow with it. We got him really used to his room, really excited about his room. We work together. He had some toddler tantrums protesting.

And so I helped her with scripts that she could use to Combat that toddler toot and everything so we work together and towards the end one time She was in there and We were using the chair method and so she was fully expected to Sit wherever the chair was in the room at that point and she heard her youngest start crying in the other room And so she said, you know, okay, hold on.

I'll be right back. I'm gonna go check on Bubby  but I'll be right back. And he said, it's okay, mommy. You can go check on Bubby. I can fall asleep. And she was like, just the tears that came. I know. And I was, I was so happy. I was like, Oh my goodness. Like, this is a huge accomplishment. And it's. It was a turning point after that and  we kept going, we kept celebrating.

One other little, like, unique piece that I do is I send videos, if the parent's okay with it, to the kids. So I'll be like, Hi, I'm Aly. I've been talking to your mommy about sleep. And, and I'll talk about how sleep is so good for our bodies and, you know, whatever method that we're implementing. Like, I'll kind of bring it up in child friendly terms.

And sometimes it helps get,  some of that off the parents, so the parent doesn't have to be the bad guy. He's like, remember Miss Aly said we need to do this because sleep is good for us. And 

I love that. 

Yes. And so then they really respond well to the video. So like sometimes the parents will let them send one back to me in the morning and they'd be like, Oh, I slept so good. Or I'm so excited. And it's like, I love it. It's the best part of my day to see their little videos and when they do have really good nights and they're so proud about it and they get to kind of show off their accomplishments and. Just being a part of that. 

That's amazing. Uh, good feelings all around for you, for the parents, for the kids. I love that. How rewarding. So tell us the name of your company. How can people get started working with you? I also know you have a podcast. I listened to a few episodes on there. That's so great. tell everyone listening where they can find you.

I'm super easy to get a hold of. My website is restfulbaby. com. I also am on Instagram, which is pretty much where everyone can find me. It's Aly underscore sleep consultant, A L L Y underscore sleep consultant. I'm there, you can check me out. And then my podcast is relatively new, but I'm super excited about it. Currently it is on Apple and Spotify, and it's Aly, the Restful Mama, and just all things motherhood and sleep.

And I'm sure that, you want You're well aware, but motherhood, man, like it's so hard. And even if you have all the help in the world, it feels so isolating. And it's so funny because I, I think that as moms, we all think that the problems that we go through and the struggles that we have and the ups and downs, they're all unique to us and no one else is experiencing it, but we're all out there going through the same thing and just a way to feel connected and support each other.

Yes, I could not agree more. I mean, I can't tell you the number of times in the last decade that I have felt alone in one experience or the other, only to, like, start slowly talking about it and the floodgates open of so many other women, navigating some of the same things. You know, and it can be really overwhelming too. And even like you mentioned earlier,  in 2024, there are so many resources out there. But it's so much that  it's a little intimidating. And when you Google, you don't know what's the right answer. Or there's all these different methods and opinions and things.

That's what I love about what you're doing. And this is what I try and do with the podcast. But anytime I think we can connect with an actual human being and like, just have somebody in our corner and have somebody to talk to and work through something with as opposed to just like, you know, an app or computer or like something that just like spits out information is just golden because I think sometimes we forget now that human connection is honestly most usually most helpful so I love the work that you're doing  and listening to podcasts obviously I'm biased but always find it helpful and you just feel like you know that person you're in their ear and you have somebody rooting you on so I love that.

I will be sure to link everything in the show notes so can easily just click it and connect with you. Aly, I appreciate it so much having this conversation and getting to know you and the work that you're doing. I know that those listening will find it, very helpful too.

Thank you. Thank you.

I hope you found value in this conversation and if you find yourself struggling in the sleep department when it comes to your baby or toddler, please consider Restful Baby. It can be so helpful to have somebody on your side in this season of life, somebody outside the home That can help you navigate whatever dreaded sleep cycle you're in with your children. We all know sleep is so important, not just for your baby, not just for your toddler, but for you. WE can't be the best moms we can be without feeling our best, and that includes getting a good night's sleep. Same thing for your children.

So reach out to Aly, set up a free consultation, and the best part is that just for our podcast listeners, Aly is offering 50 off her sleep package. So if you set up a free consult with her, just mention the promo code MOTHERHOOD and you'll receive the discounted price. Of course, I'll link all of this in the show notes, but seriously, get good sleep.

While I feel like coffee fixes most things, it's just not enough when you're in that endless cycle with your toddler. So take it from me. Set up a consult with Restful Baby. You won't regret it. And before you click out of this podcast app, do me a favor. Couple things. One, if you enjoyed this episode, hit the fifth star.

Leave a review. It is so helpful getting feedback, and it really, really helps this podcast get more eyes on it. And nobody should have to go through this journey alone. So leave a review. The next woman who finds this podcast will thank you. And last, but definitely not least sign up for the motherhood intended email list  to only send you one email a week, but in it is going to be gold. 

You are going to receive things like discounts, recipes, fertility facts, motherhood tips, support groups, all the things each week in this email, stay up to date with it all, you won't want to miss it.

And next week on the podcast, I'm welcoming on Susie, who is a doula and a childbirth educator, and we're talking all things birth plans. Maybe you've had one, maybe you didn't, maybe you're pregnant and need one either way. Be sure to tune in next week. It's a really interesting conversation I hope you have a fantastic weekend. Stay well. And I will talk to you again next week.

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