
Motherhood Intended
Are you tired of scrolling your feed only to see the highlight reel version of motherhood? Join Jacqueline Baird, a passionate mom here to support other women on their unique journeys to motherhood and beyond.
You’ll hear from experts in the fields of women’s health, fertility, and family planning, as well as from the brave women who want their unique stories to be heard. We’ll talk about unexpected paths taken, miraculous moments experienced, and how we keep going on this beautiful and ever-changing journey as mom.
This podcast will also document Jacqueline’s current life as a mom of three, plus many reflections and insight from her decade long infertility journey including multiple losses, IVF, preterm deliveries, surrogacy, and more. Stay tuned as her family’s story continues to unfold.
If you feel like you can’t always relate to the picture-perfect stories you see, follow the podcast now and join a community that’s getting real about what it takes to be a mom.
Motherhood Intended
Making Informed Choices in Pregnancy with Dr. Dallas Reed
Pregnancy comes with a lot of choices. A clear plan for information and advocacy can turn overwhelm into confidence at every step.
In this episode of Motherhood Intended, Jacqueline welcomes Dr. Dallas Reed to unpack the essentials of prenatal genetics and decision making. You will learn when to consider carrier screening before pregnancy, how NIPT fits into first trimester care, and a simple set of questions that helps you respond calmly to new information in the clinic or on the birthing unit. Dr. Reed also explains SneakPeek early gender testing in plain language, including timing and reliability.
This is a practical and encouraging guide for anyone expecting or planning to be. You will walk away with a calmer mindset, a smarter approach to appointments, and a better understanding of which tests are worth your attention.
What you will learn in this episode:
- How carrier screening works, why prior to pregnancy is ideal, and what results can mean
- Where NIPT fits in early pregnancy care, including what it screens and when it is offered
- A simple plan of questions to ask your team now, next, alternatives, and what if we wait
- How SneakPeek early gender testing works, when you can use it, and how to interpret results
- Ways to advocate for yourself while staying flexible for a safer, more positive birth experience
Links mentioned in the episode:
- SneakPeak Early Gender Test - learn more here! For $20 off your purchase, use Promo Code: Motherhood20
- More info on prenatal screening
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With space to track your symptoms, jot down questions, and take notes, this free worksheet will help you walk into your appointment feeling empowered and walk out with clarity.
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Are you tired of scrolling your feed only to see the highlight reel version of motherhood? If so, then you're in the right place. Welcome to the Motherhood Intended podcast. I'm your host, Jaclyn Baird, and I'm a passionate mom here to support women like you in their unique journeys to and through motherhood. I have been through it all. We're gonna be talking about things like trying to conceive, infertility, IVF, surrogacy, mom life, and more. It's time to get real about what it takes to be a mom and come together in the fact that things don't always go as planned. So here we go. Hey friend, it's Jacqueline. Welcome back to Motherhood Intended. Today's episode is packed with wisdom for anyone who's expecting or planning to be. So I'm joined by Dr. Dallas Reed, who is the chief of genetics and an OBGYN at Tufts Medical Center. Dr. Reed has dedicated her career to helping expected parents navigate the complexities of pregnancy. With nearly 15 years of clinical and academic experience, she's an incredible guide for understanding genetics, informed decision making, and what it really means to advocate for yourself before and during pregnancy. She's also a medical advisor for Sneak Peek, the over-the-counter early gender test that can provide accurate results as early as six weeks. I know this conversation is going to empower you with knowledge, confidence, and clarity as you move through your own journey. So let's dive right in. Take a listen. Hi, Dr. Reed. Thanks for joining me on the podcast today. I am really excited to pick your brain on the topics of, you know, making informed decisions before you get pregnant and also during pregnancy. Can you share a little bit about your journey into obsectrics, gynecology, and genetics? And then kind of just like what inspired you to dedicate your career to helping expected parents.
SPEAKER_01:Absolutely. Thank you very much for having me. I think that I'm like a lot of doctors and people in healthcare where there was something personal that happened in our lives or to someone we know that sort of got us inspired to become a physician and do the work that we do. So mine is a very personal story. I, when I was in first grade, my mom had a baby with a genetic condition. We did not know he had a genetic condition before he was born. He was born prematurely and was in the NICU for a couple months. It took a little while to figure out what his diagnosis was. This was in the 90s, so there was no Google, there was no internet, it was like much harder to get information. And we did eventually figure out his diagnosis. And he, it was a terminal condition. He wasn't going to live a long life. So we knew that. We didn't know how long he was going to live. But he did live for four months, two months in the NICU and two months at home. And, you know, I was young and obviously very formative time of my life. I did find something years later that said that I wanted to be a doctor, like when I was four years old. So I think before this happened, which I find amazing, but it was before this happened that I that I had made that proclamation. But, you know, as I was going into college and I I kind of knew all along I wanted to be a doctor, but figuring out what type of doctor, that's when I started to look a little bit more into what are the different areas of medicine. I have no doctors in my family. Okay. So it wasn't like something that I had an example for. And I was interested in genetics because of his story. And so I started looking into it more and came across medical genetics as a specialty and how it can interact with lots of other specialties, including OBGYN. And I kind of was pretty committed to that as I entered medical school and did a lot of shadowing of genetic counselors and people that took care of high-risk pregnancies and decided to do OBGYN as my residency. And then following that did extra training as a fellowship in medical genetics. And now I get to be the person that our family really needed at that time when I was in first grade, you know, the person that kind of bridges the world between pregnancy and the postnatal period and the NICU and the pediatric world. And so I feel really privileged that I get to do that. I have a very, very unique job. No one in my hospital's ever done this particular job before the way that that it's being done. And, you know, I it's it's really a privilege to be able to be in people's lives in this way.
SPEAKER_02:Yeah, that's so interesting. Like I can't believe, I mean, like you said, so many people go into their professions with this like background or like something that really hits home for them and they want to change it. And it's just incredible. You were at such a young age, you know, that stuck with you as you got older. And like that, that's what a full circle moment.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah. And to add to that full circle moment, part of it, I in residency for OBGYN is four years. And in the last two years, you're considered more of a senior resident. So as the third year started, I was on the night rotation. So you're there like every night, Monday through Friday. And as I got there, they told me about a patient in one of the rooms who had a baby with the same diagnosis that my brother had.
SPEAKER_00:Wow.
SPEAKER_01:And she, it was many, many years later. So she had already known about this diagnosis, had decided to continue her pregnancy, despite, you know, knowing that it was probably going to be very life-limiting for the baby. And I was the chief, I was in charge that night. So I was, you know, the main person in charge taking care of her. And so we talked and and all of that. And I left the next morning. She had the baby during the daytime. The baby did not survive very long. I came on the next night and I went to talk to her. And she was, you know, appropriately emotional about it and was very religious. And she said, you know, I don't know if I should talk to my children about this. Like, I don't know if I should tell them about their sister. And her children were the same age that me and my sister were when my brother was born. And I hadn't said anything to her about my own experience before that, because, you know, that's not all really always appropriate. But then I did tell her at that point. I said, you know, I, I, my mom went through the same thing. And I'm glad that I knew about it and I knew about my brother, and that's why I'm doing what I'm doing now, and that's why I'm gonna become a geneticist. And we remained pretty close while I was still living in the city I was in for my residency. But that like that full circle thing where like I still had never met anybody who had done had been a geneticist. But I was like, yes, this is exactly what I want to do, like to be there for this kind of family. And so it's awesome. It's like it's hard, but it's awesome. And I'm the only person in our whole hospital that gets to talk to couples before they get pregnant, maybe take care of them during their pregnancy, maybe deliver their baby, maybe see their baby in the NICU or as an outpatient. Like nobody else gets to do that in my in my hospital. And so it's really special.
SPEAKER_02:That is really special. And wow, that patient must have felt so validated hearing from you and you know, at that time, because all the worries that pop in when you are when you do have other kids, I'm sure, and you're you're trying to explain something like that. It had to have felt so good hearing from you personally and how lucky she was to have you there. And of course, that sounds like it just solidified your your path, which is amazing.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah, it was it was great. And I mean, that happens a lot, I think, in medicine. I I, you know, speaking to kind of the audience that you have, I have my first child was a premi. He was born at 27 weeks. And so I he was born at the hospital that I work at, and he was there for 74 days. So I was there every day, you know, visiting with him, but I had to go back to work at some point. And so, like my very first day back to work, I go to eat lunch in the NICU and see him. And there was another mom in the lunch area. So we were chatting, and then I said, Oh, have a nice day. And then I I went to go do the first consult I had for the afternoon. It was for her baby. Oh, wow. And I was like, Oh my goodness, this is probably very confusing. Yeah. I am a NICU mom, but I'm also a physician and I'm the geneticist. Did they mention I might be coming by? So it's like happens all the time, like just in the work that I do, that I sort of like crash into like my personal life and people's lives. And I and I do think it is comforting, you know. My baby didn't have anything similar to what her baby had, but like just knowing that, like, oh, you kind of get what this is about, yeah, I think was comforting for them. So for sure. I feel lucky that I get to be in that position.
SPEAKER_02:Yeah. I would have loved to run into you. I also, my first, my first son was born premature at 24 weeks, and well, 24 weeks and five days. And I say that, and you know this, but because it matters.
SPEAKER_01:Every day matters.
SPEAKER_02:Yes. And he spent like 120 days in the NICU. And I would have loved to run into you just to for comfort and knowing more. And yeah, I met other parents too in that journey, that four-month journey there. And while everyone's story was different and everyone's baby was there for different reasons, it it is comforting just knowing that they get it, just at some level, you know, you're living your life at a hospital and it's not nothing about it feels natural as a parent. So it's a good person to run into.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah, I mean, I I mean, we're getting so off topic, but I was trying to explain to somebody, I was like, I don't think you understand. I haven't seen my child's face without something on it. It's it was oh, you know, your baby was longer than my baby, but it was well over a month. I mean, it was probably six weeks or something. You know, there was always something. If they took the CPAP off, there was still like the OG or the NG, or there was always something. And so I'm like, that like you don't get that if you haven't gone through that before. It's just like, can I just see his face without something on it? Yeah, you know, I was so impatient.
SPEAKER_02:I'll never forget the first time they like took a I wasn't there at the moment and they took a picture with the CPAP off because they were like adjusting it or something, and it meant so much because again, you have I've never seen my baby yeah without that. Yeah, you definitely after a NICU experience, you definitely have a different outlook. At least I have on motherhood. You know, you don't take certain things for granted, and that journey is like ingrained in you whether whether you want it to be or not, but it's an experience.
SPEAKER_01:I also think it's another place that made me a better doctor because I I am the geneticist at our hospital. So I do all of our NICU consults if it's if they're consulting genetics, and I mean very small things like, you know, oh, you're visiting with the child, like we can certainly talk if it's a good time for you, but like I'm not gonna take the baby away to examine the baby now. Like I can come back and do that at another time, right? Just respecting the fact that like I have no idea how much time you get to be with this baby. Could be all day, but it could be this is like your one hour that you get to be here. And so just trying to like, even though my day is totally crazy and the minute I go there is probably like the only minute I have in that day, but like still trying to like make sure I respect their experience and their time and and the care times for the babies, like all that stuff I didn't know anything about. And I was I was always very confused why the nurses would get so like snippy with me if I was like, is it okay? Yeah, when it wasn't a care time. And now I get it. I'm like, yes, let's not overstimulate this baby. Let's just be quiet and lights down. Yeah. Not too much, you know, external stimulation. Like it's or like I'm helping this baby's neurologic system by just coming back another time. Like that's what I tell myself.
SPEAKER_02:Things you don't know until you are like in it. It's yeah, I know so much that I wouldn't have known otherwise after going through that experience for sure.
SPEAKER_01:Me too. I mean, I'm a doctor, you would think like I know a lot of this stuff, and I'm in the NICU as a doctor a lot, not as a neonatologist, but I learned so much. Um, and I'm glad I did. I wish I didn't have to, but I'm glad I did.
SPEAKER_02:Yeah. So it sounds like you get to work with a lot of different patients in different stages. Yeah. So for those who may not know kind of what your role involves give in terms of like supporting patients through pregnancy or prior to pregnancy, walk me through that a little bit.
SPEAKER_01:Sure. So we can focus really on sort of the conversations I have with couples and people before pregnancy and after and during pregnancy around genetics. So as an OBGYN, all OBGYNs should be really offering patients an opportunity to learn more information about themselves and their pregnancies, which could, you know, affect a whole host of decisions that a person, a pregnant person or a couple may make later on. So one test that is an option for parents is called carrier screening. It is a test that it's a blood test that's done prior to pregnancy, ideally, although many, many times it's done at the very beginning of pregnancy because people aren't talking about it before pregnancy. And it's a test to see if parents are what we call carriers for certain genetic conditions. Carriers are people who have a genetic mutation, but they themselves typically do not have that genetic condition. They don't have any features of it. And the reason for that is for most of these conditions, you need two mutations in order to have it, one from each parent. And so carriers just have one mutation and their other one is completely normal. And so these are conditions in which people wouldn't know that they're a carrier for typically because their siblings are not affected, their parents are not affected, they themselves are not affected, and so there's really no way to know without doing the testing. Carrier screening comes in big big sizes and small sizes, and you know, obviously talk to your doctor about it if you're interested to know like what they offer. There's different laboratories that do it. The one that I work with pretty closely is called Myriad Genetics, and their carrier screening is called foresight, just sort of this idea of like looking ahead to see what could be. And the benefit of doing carrier screening is a couple things. One is that again, you don't you may not know that these genetic conditions are run in your family or are are something that you have a chance of having a child with. So just that knowledge can be really helpful. Secondly, if you are pregnant or planning to become pregnant, you may want to know some details about these conditions. Many of them can be quite significant, they could potentially cause multiple health difficulties or learning learning issues or developmental delays or autism, for example. They may require special doctor's appointments or special therapies. Some of them we may actually have treatments or almost cures for, and so it's important to know that. But getting that information can really help you decide how you want to build your family, if you want to have biological children or any children at all, where you may need to deliver those children if they need extra special needs, what kind of doctors you may want to talk to during a pregnancy to learn about those conditions. Really just, you know, doing it prior to pregnancy really gives you that whole array of options. So it's it can be really important information for people to do what is, you know, best for their situation and their their relationship and their family.
SPEAKER_02:Yeah. I'm just I'm really happy you're saying this because and I'm curious because this was uh not on my radar and I didn't know anything about it when like my husband and I were gonna start trying to have a family, and it wasn't until like talking to like an infertility doctor and going down that route where all of the genetic testings, pregenetic testings and testings of embryos and all of that were brought into the picture. Is this something that couples who are like doing proactively, or is this do you see patients who have like are on this like infertility path or is it a mixture?
SPEAKER_01:Yeah, so it really should be offered to anybody that's considering to having children. And I will emphasize the best time to do it is prior to becoming pregnant because there are other options available, such as in future fertilization. You know, there's people that do IVF that do it not because of infertility reasons, right? They do it because of lots of other reasons. And one reason to do it is if you know that you or you and your partner both carry a genetic mutation for a condition, and it would be important to you to potentially not have a child with that condition, then IVF with what's called PGT, which stands for pre-implantation genetic testing, is an option. But it's only an option if you know the genetic mutations that run in your family or that the parents have. So this testing does have to be done prior to doing the PGT process. But it happens many times that people do not know about this testing. They don't do it until the very beginning of a of a current ongoing pregnancy, like at that first appointment. And then they find out they're a carrier and their partner's also a carrier. And if I should have said this before, but if both parts of the couple are a carrier, both people of the couple are a carrier, there's a 25% chance they could have a child each pregnancy that the child could have that condition. So 75% chance that they won't, but 25% chance that they will. Yeah. And so if we find that in a pregnancy, what we do is send people to usually what's called a prenatal genetic counselor who will talk to them about that condition. Because some conditions for some people, they feel like this is fine. I'm okay with this, I'm prepared for this. I will, you know, I appreciate knowing this information and and I will, you know, proceed accordingly. And really that's what for anybody, proceed accordingly, you know, based on what the information you get. You know, sometimes people find out during a pregnancy and then they use that information potentially for IVF for subsequent pregnancies, for example. So that's why I say the ideal time to do it is before pregnancy.
SPEAKER_02:Yeah. I am a firm believer in like the more you know. I mean, I so much in my own personal journey has been like in hindsight or like when it's came up. And so I think it's so important to educate on these different things because, like you mentioned, you know, there are so many different genetic disorders and things that, and some are more serious than others, and that could look really different for your family. And so making informed decisions is so important. I know I as a parent, you know, it can feel, I'm sure, overwhelming. And, you know, there's different tests out there. You know, how should parents kind of decide which are right for them? Like, where do you even begin? I guess.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah. So I that's one of the things I wanted to mention is that, you know, the way that we're talking about it, I think some people could interpret that this is just very scary, like, oh my gosh, this is so overwhelming. Pregnancy is already scary enough. I don't really want to be more scared.
SPEAKER_00:Yeah.
SPEAKER_01:And I think that the way that I try to talk to my patients about it is it's about information. And there are some people that want a lot of information and some people that are information averse. Like I see the full spectrum of it. And so you kind of have to know yourself a little bit. But it is information that you wouldn't know otherwise. And and depending on the condition and also the couple, like I don't want to make it sound like every condition every couple would have the same reaction to. That is certainly not the case. And I think that's why it's really important to have conversations with experts about this stuff so that you can figure out what matters for you. But condition A may for one couple be very, very serious. And they may not have even heard of that condition before. And I guarantee you they probably haven't. And so just thinking about what all that could mean, it's impossible to do that before pregnancy or, you know, before it happens to you, kind of like you what you were saying. And so I don't want this to sound scary. I want it to sound like this is an opportunity for information and and the information is there for you to do whatever you need to do, right? It's not, it's not as if we as medical professionals are prescribing a certain set of steps after you have the information. It is really for you to get the information and decide what to do. So, one website that I think is fairly helpful that talks about this is called nomoresooner.com. Okay.com. It's a website that was created by Myriad Genetics. They do this foresight carrier screening, as I mentioned. Another genetic test that we haven't yet touched on is called non-invasive prenatal testing. Myriad's product is called prequill, and it is the testing that probably a lot of pregnant patients have heard of. It's the screening for Down syndrome that we do nowadays. It's a blood test that looks at the chance that the fetus could have Down syndrome and trisomy 13 and trisomy 18, which are two other genetic conditions. Most people are familiar with it because it can also tell you the sex of the baby. Yeah. Although we're not doing it for that reason. We're really doing that to look to see if those what we call sex chromosomes are the appropriate number that we expect, which is two. So this website, No More Sooner, has information about carrier screening and about the non-invasive prenatal testing and kind of the myths around them, too. I it's a really well-done website where they have videos of people that actually did the testing and how they used that information. And it's really meant to be like empowering and not so scary.
SPEAKER_02:That's so helpful. I did not know about that website. That's really, really helpful. And that's what it's all about, right? You want to just have the information if you if you want it to make informed decisions and feel confident in your pregnancy. It's not meant to scare you, like you said. So I'm glad we're like differentiating here because this is all, this is what we do on this podcast. We have a lot of hard conversations, and we also, but the whole point is just to educate and listeners can take what they want from it. And just that way they have more tools in their tool belt as they go forth in pregnancy and motherhood. So that is a great website. I will have to share that in the show notes too, just so everyone has an easy way to visit that. So I wanted to talk a little bit about making like informed decisions during your pregnancy. So we've talked about obviously there's a lot of genetic tests that can be done prior to pregnancy and like the ones you mentioned while you're pregnant. You know, pregnancy can involve in general just so many decisions. There's the ultrasounds and tests, medications, delivery options, especially for like a first-time mom. It can feel like a lot. What kind of like framework do you recommend parents use to make sure that they're making informed, confident choices, especially like for these first-time parents who are just kind of overwhelmed with it all?
SPEAKER_01:Yeah, it's very overwhelming. And I think, you know, being an OBGYN, it's also really hard to get into the details of everything.
SPEAKER_00:Yeah.
SPEAKER_01:Like in that 20-minute visit you have, 15-minute, 20-minute visit you have with the patient. And I wish we had more time. That's why things like doulas and labor support is super helpful because they do have more time. I mean, the way our system works, we just don't have the time. It's not that we don't want to have it, it's just it's a business and like our bosses are telling us we got to keep seeing patients. And so it is what it is. But there's a couple things that I tell patients. One and couples. One is that, you know, if you social media is great, but it's also got a lot of misinformation. Yeah. And so I always really encourage people to kind of there's something they've read or saw that is like piquing their interest or they're curious about for their own pregnancy or delivery, please bring it to your doctor. You know, there can be things that are just not true. They're just not reality. There can be things that may not be possible to do at your particular hospital. You know, there's lots of reasons why that information that you see on social media may or may not be real life. So please go talk to your doctor, bring it to your doctor, and hopefully you have a doctor that you feel a trust with that you can do that and feel like you aren't being judged by, you know, the questions that you're asking. I mean, I have patients that come to me and they say, Oh, they ask me this question. I answer their, you know, question in detail, and they're like, Oh, that's what, oh, that's exactly what I what it said on TikTok. And I sarcastically say, Oh, I'm so glad me and TikTok have the same experience. Yeah, right. The same expertise. You know, and I say it like kind of in a snarky way, and I and I mean it, but I don't mean it. I'm glad that they're coming to me with these questions, but please always go to your doctor with those questions.
SPEAKER_00:Yeah.
SPEAKER_01:The second thing is, you know, I think because there's so much information out there and people don't know any, they have no idea what to expect. It is very hard if you have no knowledge on the subject to be able to vet information and be like, oh, that seems legit and that doesn't. And so that's one reason why you should go to your doctor. But it's also, I think, why people get so overwhelmed, why I think there's so much, I think there's so much more anxiety around pregnancy now because there's just so much out there. And so what and and I'm getting more and more patients like refusing things that were very standard before, that are asking lots and lots of questions about things that have just been routine. Yeah. And I'm not judging that, I'm just saying it's it's it has changed. There's it's coming from somewhere and it has changed. And with that vibe, what I really try to tell patients that seem incredibly anxious about all of the steps of the process is I want you to be informed about what's happening. And so the framework I think you should use is especially this is like on labor and delivery when things are happening randomly, it seems like, and you don't know what's going on, is you know, ask the team, you know, what the plan is. Like, what are we doing now and what will we be doing next? And if there's like an intervention that will need to be happening now or next, I think it's important to ask what is this inf intervention? Why do we need to do it? What happens if we don't do it? Are there other alternatives to doing it? What happens if we do nothing? You know, get those questions answered. Because I think if you have those questions answered, you will make the best decision for you. And it will likely be the decision that we are hoping you make as well. Because, you know, we've sort of we do this a lot and we kind of see how things go, the the pros and the cons of all the options. And it doesn't mean there aren't points in which there are options, but sometimes there are fewer options than other times.
SPEAKER_02:Yeah.
SPEAKER_01:And so I I think for people that just feel really out of control in the whole process, because that's very easy to feel in a labor and delivery setting, that kind of running through that list of questions can be really helpful because at the end of that, you'll have the information you need to make a decision.
SPEAKER_00:Yeah.
SPEAKER_01:Um, I also think doulas are really important and helpful. And it's a shame that, you know, insurance doesn't cover them everywhere and that everybody doesn't have access to them. And so I get that that can be an inequity for some families, but I do think they can be helpful if they're, you know, knowledgeable and and, you know, have have been doing this for some time. They kind of are are really helpful in answering a lot of those questions and being really supportive, of course, which is their main job.
SPEAKER_02:Yeah, I think the biggest thing too, just from what I've heard of like talking with other women who have utilized Adula too, is like they're kind of there to do exactly what you just said is to like make sure you know like the answers to these questions because you don't know what to ask if you if you're not informed. And so like they're kind of like, you know, the bridge because, like you mentioned, I mean, doctors, you you only have so much time. You can't sit there and explain every little thing that could possibly happen, but they kind of help you create a plan for asking these questions.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah. And telling somebody every little thing that can happen is also not helpful.
SPEAKER_02:Like nobody would walk out of that conversation feeling like excited about the it's definitely a fine line of like wanting information, but then like I also feel like ignorance is bliss sometimes. Yeah, because that's a it's a lot.
SPEAKER_01:Yes, I I would agree. The other thing I just wanted to say is that like on that page of the anxiety that I think has kind of increased over time, which is rightfully so. I'm not judging. I think that a lot more people, I've noticed a lot more patients coming in with like sort of this rigid idea of what they want to happen at the time of delivery, you know, labor and delivery. And I I do not think that's a healthy perspective.
SPEAKER_00:Yeah.
SPEAKER_01:I think that I tell my patients, I think the most optimal way to walk into labor and delivery is with an air of flexibility. You certainly can have an idea of how you would like things to go, and there be certain preferences for some parts of the process. But at the end of the day, what I'm trying to do as an OBGYN is get you a healthy baby and you to be a healthy mom. That's what I'm trying to do, and your family to be intact. That's what I'm trying to do at the end of this delivery. And sometimes it goes exactly how all of us want it to go, and sometimes it doesn't. And patients who feel very rigid about that and feel like we are swaying from the plan, like like you know, where that it totally makes their whole world crumble. I think they have a worse birth experience. And I think they have more trauma around their birth experience, even if it was a vaginal delivery that, you know, was totally fine. Like I'm not even talking about patients who end up, you know, having a c-section, for example. So I just think that it's a much healthier place to be mentally to come into it with this idea that like, if I don't need a C-section, I don't want a C-section. But if the if after asking all of my questions, if the if the team that's there thinks this is the safest thing for me or my baby, I I'm gonna try to go with that because we are trying to do the safest thing for you and your baby. I know we get a bad rap, but we are trying to do the best thing for you and your baby.
SPEAKER_02:I couldn't agree more. And maybe this is, I mean, we both have been through something that was definitely not the plan, right? We didn't plan to. Have babies born so prematurely. And I think that just kind of taught me right off the bat that like plans are cute, but that things don't always go to plan. And the number one goal, like you said, is like a healthy baby, keeping a family intact, all of those things. I know that's definitely helped me throughout my other subsequent pregnancies, as different and as challenging as they were. But there's I've definitely seen a shift. You know, I have friends and family that are that are younger than me and they're, you know, a a decade behind of when I started having kids and the things they know now because of or know, like quotes, just the things they hear and read about all these different things. I mean, I didn't even know what a birth, like everyone has birth plans and all these very detailed things. And that wasn't even on my radar. I was like, I just hope to bring home a healthy baby. And and now I think kind of what we're talking about, because I think I also was just uh on the other end of the spectrum where I was like, whatever the doctor says, like they're right, they know. And now, after years of different experiences, I do know that it is important to advocate for yourself and and be knowledgeable. But like you said, going into it with flexibility, it's gonna be a more enjoyable experience all around because nothing ever goes exactly to plan, even if it's a healthy pregnancy.
SPEAKER_01:Right. And I think that like I tell people, this is like preparation for parenthood. Like, do you have a hundred babies follow anybody's directions? No, no, they do whatever they want. Yeah, like so you have to be flexible, and this is like your first time practicing it. It's a really important time because you know, people, it's it's a real thing. People have a lot of trauma from their birth experiences for good reason.
SPEAKER_00:Yeah.
SPEAKER_01:I'm not trying to discount any of those experiences, but I do think people like just like we do a lot of other sort of meditation and mental health practices to help us get through life as complicated as it is. I also think that we need to do the same when we're thinking about our birth experience and and understanding things can go differently than we think.
SPEAKER_02:Yeah, absolutely. I think that's like the number one like overarching theme of motherhood is that like you have to be flexible and nothing goes to plan. Because once you are a parent, yeah, you have another human who might have a different idea than than you do that day, especially those toddlers.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah, I have two that always have a different idea of what I want to do right now.
SPEAKER_02:My 17-month-old is very opinionated these days, but I think that's it's the first lesson you learn as a mom and it and it will carry through for sure. So I'm glad that you mentioned that. Before we wrap up, I also wanted to talk to you about. So you're also a medical advisor for Sneak Peek, which is like an early gender test. So, for listeners who may not know, how does that work? And then what makes it reliable so early in pregnancy?
SPEAKER_01:I was gonna bring it up because we've talked about like this, you know, scarier to some people genetic test, the carrier screening and on a lighter note. And IPT. Yeah, but then I was like, but there is like fun testing too. Totally. So Sneak Peak is is also a product that Myriad Genetics has. They are like the leading, you know, this is the leading product on the market for for this early fetal sex test. And essentially what it is is an at-home blood draw. So you could order it on the website sneakpeak.com, you can order it on Amazon, you can get it at CVS, Walmart, uh, Walgreens. And what it is, there's a little device that you can attach to your arm. It has very teeny tiny needles in them, like so tiny you barely feel anything. And people that are scared of needles, these are not real needles, these are like barely anything. So you just attach it to your arm and it it has a little tube on it and it collects like three to five drops of blood. You cap it, you send it back to Sneak Peek, and they will, once they receive it within 24 hours, can give you the fetal sex. So if it's boy or expect it to be boy or expect it to be girl. And the way the testing works, the technology of it is they're using that cell-free DNA, which is the same kind of DNA they're looking for in the NIPT test, the prequel test. And what they're essentially looking for is there is there any X chromosome material? So if you remember from biology, genetic males have an X and a Y chromosome, and females have two X chromosomes. And so they're looking for that Y chromosome, and if they see it, then that means that the fetus is expected to be male. A common question I get about that is well, what if it's twins? Oh yeah, or triplets or something to that effect. And so it's only looking for that Y chromosome material. So if it sees it, then that means at least one of the babies is male, and it could be both, could you may not be that you don't really know until until you do the ultrasounds that happen later that can tell you the the sex of the baby.
SPEAKER_00:Gotcha.
SPEAKER_01:It's more than it's like 99% reliable, and it can be done as early as six weeks. So that is like earlier than you even have your first doctor's appointment. So you can already go to your doctor's appointment knowing like what you're having. The only caveat is you have to have taken, it's not a pregnancy test. So you do have to have done a pregnancy test first to confirm that you're pregnant. It's not, it's not like confirming your pregnancy, but it's just looking for that Y chromosome material.
SPEAKER_02:Okay. That is very exciting because I know so many, so many parents out there get very hyped up about finding out the sex of the baby. I know we did this with our kids, you know, before we even we did IVF, but we didn't do genetic testing until my third um before surrogacy. And so I just again didn't didn't know and it wasn't recommended. And um, if I could do it all over again, I would have tested from the start. Luckily, we had two healthy boys, but yeah, their sex was a surprise to us. And I love how everyone goes all out, and that's really cool that it's so easy that you can do it at home and so seal. That's wild.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah. I mean, it's like the amount of enthusiasm over if it's gonna be a boy or if it's gonna be a girl, I think is like probably the number one question I get. If I even put anything on a patient's abdomen, they're like, is it a boy or a girl? I'm like, you're too early for me to know that with this particular test. So then usually I'm like, but there's sneak peek if you really want to know, you know, this minute. And because because without that, the the foresight, I'm sorry, the prequil NIPT test actually can be done as early as eight weeks. That's actually the earliest any of those NIPT tests can be done, those screenings can be done. And so, but some people that two weeks is too much. Yeah. Like they can't wait that long. And and because with prequil, we're actually looking at more things. It's not just the sex of the fetus, it's the you know, yes, genetic conditions. It takes a little bit longer. So the benefit of sneak peek is it's really very, very soon and you can get the results back really quick. Yeah. And you can buy it, you don't have to go to your doctor, you can just go to Amazon or CVS or any of those places and get it. Yeah.
SPEAKER_02:Yeah, that's awesome. And I could be wrong, but are this seems really accurate too? 99% like and so early. Cause, and correct me if I'm wrong, or some of the other tests, maybe I'm thinking of something else. I just remember I feel like my OB saying, like, oh, you can take that test between 11 weeks and 14 weeks. The longer you wait, the more accurate it is. Is that kind of the difference between these? Or again, correct me if I'm wrong.
SPEAKER_01:So that no, that test that you're talking about is NIPT test. And so uh when it first came out, it was kind of like 10, 11 weeks was the earliest, and many labs do nine or 10 weeks. Myriad is the only lab with the prequel test that does it as early as eight weeks. Okay. And the reason for that is that you need a certain fraction of the DNA to be coming from the fetus or the pregnancy in order to accurately capture all the things that need to be captured with NIPT. Gotcha. With the sneak peek test, you're really just looking at the Y chromosome material. So you don't really need a lot of DNA to be able to do that. Okay. Um that makes sense. And so it's just a little bit of a different thing that they're looking for in the two tests.
SPEAKER_02:Okay. Beyond curiosity, like about gender, are there other benefits to early accessible at-home testing like this for expected parents?
SPEAKER_01:I do think that the sneak peek test allows people to really like start to feel bonded with their baby already, which I think there's a lot of value in that. Yeah. Obviously, it's, I mean, people are so enthusiastic about knowing, but just like they already when you become pregnant, you're like already planning your life. Right. You can't help this baby. And you can't help it. And I think that that can really be helpful. And then, you know, obviously many, not many, but a good number of pregnancies end in miscarriage. And that may be before you have had the opportunity to have any of these genetic tests in the pregnancy. It may be at eight weeks or 10 weeks, for example. So, you know, I think it depends on the person, but maybe knowing this about the baby was is helpful too. Like, because you have bonded with that pregnancy, and even though it wasn't as long as a full-term pregnancy. And so I think for some people it helps with like that grieving process and you know, just it's kind of validation that, like, okay, I was pregnant. There was a boy or a girl in there. And so that may be of a benefit to some people too.
SPEAKER_02:Yeah, that's a really good point. I'm also just thinking, too, for those listening who, you know, have might be pregnant after, you know, years of infertility or going through fertility treatments, like we mentioned, there's so much that you can't control and you can feel very anxious about that. And I know for myself, that was one piece that I was like, I just want to know. And then I can control what I buy, like what I think about names, like as soon as possible. For me, it kind of like lowered the anxiety and felt like I have, you know, some sort of information about what's going on and, you know, starting to feel connected to a pregnancy that I thought might never happen, you know? So I think that yeah, that could be really helpful as well. Yeah.
SPEAKER_01:No, I agree with you.
SPEAKER_02:I appreciate you being on the podcast with me today. Your insights were so helpful, not only as a doctor, but as your experiences as a mom as well. Where can listeners connect with you and learn more about the resources that you recommended? I will definitely add whatever I can in the show notes to make that super simple, but where can they connect with you?
SPEAKER_01:Yeah, I think the best, the two best places based on the things we talked about today were nomorsooner.com, like we talked about, and then the sneak peek.com is where you can get a lot of information about that particular test. I'm not that much on social media these days. Like it's just getting wild and crazy out there. So I'm I'm sort of just taking a break. But those are the places you can get some information about the test that we talked about today, which is probably what people are really wanting to know about.
SPEAKER_02:Absolutely. That's perfect. I will be sure to share those links. Well, thank you again. This has been really great. Thanks for having me. Of course. Thank you for hitting play on this episode today. A big thank you to Dr. Reed as well for sharing her expertise and encouragement with us. I know that so many of you are walking away with practical insights you can use right away, which is awesome. If you enjoyed this episode, please share it with a friend who's expecting or planning for pregnancy. These conversations are so much more powerful when we spread them through our communities. And before you go, I wanted to let you know that I created a free doctor's appointment prep sheet to help you feel confident and prepared every time you walk into your doctor's office. You can grab it for free at the link in the show notes. There is a printable version as well as a fillable PDF that you can use right on your phone to take notes. Whatever's easiest for you, it's just something I wanted you to have in your back pocket so you can get the most out of every appointment and feel fully supported. As always, thank you for being here and for being part of this community. Until next time, I'm Jaclyn and this is Motherhood Intended. Oh, PS. The opportunity to become a founding member of your Fertility Village is here. That's right, doors to the village are officially open, and we would love to have you. Click the link in the show notes to learn more.